Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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HELLO EVERYONE

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Take part of what?

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops