A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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Q: What did the 6 year old cancer patient say he wanted to be when he was older? A: Doesn't matter he died

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What do I hate? people

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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What's worse than a spray tan? - A spray tan of hydrochloric acid.

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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