Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

Hello

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

why did the black man apply for a job at kfc? His family was in debt after the loss of his father.

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...