Roses are red, Violets are violet They are not blue You stupid twat

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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