Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Knock knock. Who's there? There's no need to ask this question due to the fact that most homes are built with peepholes nowadays.

how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

What's upside down? umop apisdn

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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