Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

An anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

hi jonny

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Read a Book.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops