Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops