What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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How many light bulbs? 1

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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