roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops