The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

What happens to the blond when she reaches the top of the stairs She falls down them

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

miha kako si?

Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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