There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Dude man, I'm high...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops