What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? When 6 was just a young boy living in a quaint suburbial town, his family, 1 2 3 4 and 5 were all killed by 7. 7 then burned down their house while 6 ran away from the blazing inferno he used to call home. 6 was forced to live off the land in order to survive. 6 built a house using only mud and sticks and a little elbow grease. When 7 heard the news that 6 was still alive and well in the forest, 7 went into the woods, tracked down 6's home and again burned it down. When 6 came back from a day of fishing and a handfull of fish, he saw that his house was burned down. The fish then escaped from his hands, and flew away. 7 had left a note on the ground that said 7. 6 then recalled the first time 7 had killed his family and burned down house. 7 had now burned down two of 6's houses. That is why 6 is afraid of 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"knock knock" "Come in"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I don't know about anybody else, but I just watched a part of a My Little Pony episode, and there's something about them that makes you want to come back and watch more. It's wierd, like mind control. Has anyone noticed this?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops