Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

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What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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