Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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What do you call an amazing person Good

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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