Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

Penis

knock knock come in!

your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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