What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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Pop Fiction last words. guess who edition: "Okay okay you win again Batman! Ahahaha hohohoho hehehehe! Wanna hear a new jo... Eh... what are you doing with that gun?" "Why did I not just take a step or two to the side during the five hours and over thirty episodes he kept charging that Kamehameha?" "Bah I cannot die as long as my ego is full! Are these really the ratings on my latest game? H0moerotic? Childish? A sociopath? Oh man..." Moral: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the moralmanBitch! HOAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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Click here for free sandwich.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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