A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops