A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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knock,knock you suck

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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Yes

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops