What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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A man walks into a bar every night. He works there.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Jews for Jesus

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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Men's rights

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Why were corners made? For crying.

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

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CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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