Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

What will happen when a black person die they die

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Are you well? No, I'm not a well, I'm a person.

What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

A baby seal walks into a club.

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

DANA

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh my gosh, my yard is on fire!!!

You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

Knock Knock! Who's there? No-one No-one who? .......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...