Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car!

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Jasper sucks.

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Dallas Cowboys

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

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A man walks into a bar every night. He works there.

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To pen state administraters walk into a butt

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What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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why do anti jokes suck???? Because CC is Jewish and rapes orphan squirrels EJ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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