Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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If Bob has 65 sweets and he eats 57 how many does he have? Bob has diabetes. He has high blood sugar, either because the body does not produce enough insulin, or because cells do not respond to the insulin that is produced.

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Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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