A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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