Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

[Insert anti-joke here]

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops