How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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