- Anti Joke

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

why did the black man apply for a job at kfc? His family was in debt after the loss of his father.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.