Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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