Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

I have a really funny joke.

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

NEVER

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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