How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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school homewrok

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops