Roses are red. Violets are blue.

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

Why is the baby on fire? Because there was a gas leak at the day care facility. It would have been a terrible tragedy had a heroic babysitter not come to the rescue.

What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

I'm Polish.

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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