A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Where's the best place to gather black people to roleplay as prison victims for a documentary? Prison or the Graveyard.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

At least now we know, that most people are not like that, and with that sentence, my desire to see humanity as a whole happy, is dead. Thank you, you have made me realize that for each and every thing positive I have found within myself, I believed that I was simply learning more about how to be an average human being. I admire you, yet as painful it feels not to deny the truth, much of what I admire within you, reminds me of my self. Share that money with me, but as a gift, not as a contract, as a friend, not as someone buying me out, because my values might not be much, but for now, its what remains of the world I sought to create. Let us speak some other time, It was nice meeting you again Red, you always dig your way into my core, where I discover that I am stuck in life because I still sad deep inside, and then you take some of that sadness away.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Ben Corbishley

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops