what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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