why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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