What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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What do a Mexican and a elephant have in common? Aside from the fact they're both alive beings, they share the same kingdom, phylum, class and the fact of both being alive beings, each other are in constant contact with the environment, they both share affectionate ties with partners of their species, being them from the same family, breeding partner ou even just alive beings of the same especies of each one.

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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Grease is the word that you heard it's got groove it's got meaning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops