Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

Knock Knock Come in

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...