Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

Nobody cares maddie!

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

Is Yered a dumbass? YA

What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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