What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops