Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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