Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

Where do you find a pile of dead lawyers? In my basement.

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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