why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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