what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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Jesus Christ

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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You know what's funny? Rape

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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