What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

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Looks like you are having a TUFF time recovering from the game.....lol.....

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops