Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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