Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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guess what? bannanas

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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