A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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