What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

What do you tell a woman who claims that she is going to yell "fire" in a crowded movie theater? That doing so could result in serious injuries or even death, and that she would be wise to reconsider her future options, as she could be held responsible for any and all problems that arise.

BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

What did the oak tree say to the pine tree? Nothing tress dont speak regardless of the kind.

Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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