Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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Cheese

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

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roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops