Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

what is worse than a guy pissed?

You know what's cool? Yep.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple except for the elephant.

What do you call a drunk, blind, deaf monkey driving a car? A bloody good driver!

If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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