Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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Women's rights.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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I Have a Black Friend

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops