Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

i hate non minorities!

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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