Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

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-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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Chuck Norris can carry very heavy objects.

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Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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