Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Obama lin Baden.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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