In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

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What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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