your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

My jeans

There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

Bitch

Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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