So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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What do you call a black man eating dessert? A man of African ancestry enjoying a sweet treat.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

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What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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