what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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