Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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