If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops