What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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What did the American WWII soldier say to the Feudal-era samurai? Nothing, because the two lived on completely different continents and in completely different time periods.

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What did the one Lame say to the other Lame? I don't know, what did you say?

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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