How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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