How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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