What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

God is real.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

A gay man watches football.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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