Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Burp

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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knock knock Goodbye

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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