There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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