Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops