Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Whats brown and smells bad poo

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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