What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops