why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

Killing your friend as a joke.

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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