A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

Kerry Katona becomes independent.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

bite me

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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