A Chinese man fails a math test

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops