Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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