An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

this website is a bad joke

What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

homosexual rights to marriage

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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