What more orange that a lime? Most things.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

thumb_up thumb_down -9

scraggle is in you pillow case

thumb_up thumb_down -9

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

thumb_up thumb_down -9

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops