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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

My dog barks when someones at the door.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

LeBron in the fourth quarter

How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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