give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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I am a mime

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

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What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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