A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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what does a chair look like? a chair.

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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What did the Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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