How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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