What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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