a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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