What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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