whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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