Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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