Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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