What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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