Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

Communism hehe xd

what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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