What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down -15

No

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops