this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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