What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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