roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops