What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops