Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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poo

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What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? So he could tell me to tell this joke to everybody and therefore prevent the universe from exploding

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops