How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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