Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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