what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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