Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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