How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

Turkey Balls

My mom

Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

Knock knock... Home invasion

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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