A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Charlie Sheen

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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I don't get it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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A dancer walks into a barre

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops