My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

Where do you find a pile of dead lawyers? In my basement.

Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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