If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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Maths.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

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Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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