What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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