What's 1+1? 69.

What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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