Maths.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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