What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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