I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having a giant, angry ape on steroids rip your heart out and eat it before your eyes as you painfully die from the unbearable pain and rapid blood loss.

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

Ben Corbishley

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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