Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Tucker Rivera

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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