Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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