How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

dat shoe shine tho

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? A black man eating fried chicken.

What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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