man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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25

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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How you know when dislextic

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops