What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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