Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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hers a joke... japanese people

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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A pope meets another one

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops