What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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A man walks into a bar. [Insert punchline here.]

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come along children

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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josh simpson has cancer

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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AROUND

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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amy copied adams haircut :0

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I won the game.

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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What's worse than forgetting a punchline?

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

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Women's rights

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How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

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Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops