For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

I like to eat.

A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

Q:What happened to the leprechaun when it jumped in the water? A:It got wet.

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

Penis

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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