Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops