Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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What do you call a blue chair A black person

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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