Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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so today i took a poop. hehe

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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95556

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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