How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops