Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

THEN WHO WAS FONE?

Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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