What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

thumb_up thumb_down

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

thumb_up thumb_down

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

thumb_up thumb_down

a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

thumb_up thumb_down

A duck walks in wal-mart and buys stuff. The cashier ask how hes going to pay and the duck said just put it on my bill.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

thumb_up thumb_down

a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down

I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops