what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

What rhymes with milk...milf

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

my penis

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

What happens when a Jew, a black man, and a Latino walk into the bar? The potential for racial humor.

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

Knock knock. Get out!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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