What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

What did the sheriff call the death of a black man who was shot 14 times? -The worst case of suicide he'd ever seen.

homosexual rights to marriage

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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