Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

men's rights activists

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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