Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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