Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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