An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Death by kayak

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops