What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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A black man walks out of a police station

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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What does it mean when somebody is Jewish? They eat palahuardo por sinquevos for breakfast. Qua.

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

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Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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