How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Jack Stevens

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

What rhymes with milk...milf

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

I'm tired.

What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...