A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense..............

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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