what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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womens rights.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get to the hospital before he lost to much blood from his stab wound.

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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