I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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