A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

bangers and mash?

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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