- Anti Joke

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

Tony Romo

xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

Why wasn't the unplugged computer on?

Cripples are lame.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet