Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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The Labour Party.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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