How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

thumb_up thumb_down

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

thumb_up thumb_down

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

thumb_up thumb_down

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

thumb_up thumb_down

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

thumb_up thumb_down

Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

thumb_up thumb_down

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

thumb_up thumb_down

Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

thumb_up thumb_down

Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

thumb_up thumb_down

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops