What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops