How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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there is a fat ass bitch who lives in littlefield TX, her name...Krista. her facebook.... NannyGrizzly. I hate her!!! with a pasion... she was my neighbor... i can hear her yelling all the time. Please... someone give her a reason to yell. .................Facebook..........Nannygrizzly.......do....something.....about.......her.... thank you. Ima TROLE!!!!! hahahahaahhhahahahahahahaahha. damn it. (: v P PS. she is a bitch

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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