Democracy.

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

Como estan lo que sienta in el tarea de tomo caliente? A. Los sientos! ~ this is why nobody likes Spanish

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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