Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

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a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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