I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Long joke Your such a downey

This is an anti-joke.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A Carrot.

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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