Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -35

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -37

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I agree

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

thumb_up thumb_down -41

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

thumb_up thumb_down -41

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops