sfdg

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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when i yell your name i probably want your attention :) S.H.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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three retards, a Jew, 4 Mexicans, and an Eskimo go to the grocery store. Windex is on sale. The Jew bought artichokes.

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Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water jack collapsed because of serious drug abuse and stress jill followed after not being able to handle the tragedy of her brothers death this wouldn't have happened if they got into my van when i asked them too.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A: My dog has no nose. B: How does it smell? A: Terrible.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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