Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops