Wanna hear a joke? no

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

Did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side??? Yeah he's all right now!!!

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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