how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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