Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops