a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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A boy with red hair is happy.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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star wars kid

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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