What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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