Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

LeBron in the fourth quarter

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

My dog barks when someones at the door.

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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