A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops