What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Little Jimmy had walked in on his parents. "Mummy what are you doing with dad?" "Baking a cake" She replied. Two hours later the cake had then cooled and was consumed by all.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops