why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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