ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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Bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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