My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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