What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

5 Italian guys from Long Island

What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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