Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Jimmy Saville

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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