Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

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why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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