Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

Everybody love food when they are hungry

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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