What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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Whites black white and red all over? The nazi flag.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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