There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

Flowers are colors Love me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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