Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -12

james hedge is gay did you know if you look at him you turn gay

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops