How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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12/23/2012

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

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How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops