Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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I just started the seafood diet. It consists primarily of eating fish due to its high nutritional content.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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How do you confuse a chicken? Paint yourself black and throw seeds at it.

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knock,knock you suck

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc, I've been having the strangest dreams First I'm a tee pee, Then I'm a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam! What could be wrong with me?" The doctor looks at the man and says, "You have aids."

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

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Greg and Michal once had a fight I lost.

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hi michael

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a nice evening.

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Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

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Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops