hello

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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why did amelia earhart get lost? because she was a woman

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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