A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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Donald Trump

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops