what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Why was Little Timmy crying ? He dropped his ice cream. Why did he drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus. Knock-Knock! Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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