Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

My Nan, that is all.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

A young baby died.

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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