Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

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A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

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Why did the chicken walk across the road? Because chickens cannot fly

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Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

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Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Q:What's similar between a squirel and a eagle? A:Both have wings, exept for the squirrel.

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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jews

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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