Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what has balls and is long and suckible? Spaghetti

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops