What's 1+1? 69.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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why didnt jane scream when she got robbed? Because she got shot.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops