roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

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Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

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What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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Its easy they said, just type your text below they said, so I did

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops