Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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